As a breast cancer thriver, I reflect on my journey from time to time. So what is different after all the treatments, surgeries, scans, and doctor appointments? Well, there are 8 things.
- I freeze frame and slow motion moments. Have you seen the movie The Matrix? When Keanu Reeves is on the roof and the bullets are flying past him in slow motion so he’s dodging them? That’s how I feel sometimes. Like when I went to my son’s school play. Coming out of the production, walking to my car, my bottom lip started to tremble and my eyes filled with tears. “God, I want to be at all his opening nights and firsts,” I said to myself. I stood there in the parking lot frozen while everything around me kept moving. I do that now, to preserve the moment.
- Quality time with people. My sons think I smother them. I sure do hug them extra tight and ask them a million questions. I treasure time with friends and family.
- I don’t take things as seriously now. Who has time for drama? Not me!
- When I feel stress coming on, I pray, “Lord, I can’t handle this, you have to work it out.” Guess what? He does.
- And I have a sexy new look. People love my short hair style. And so do I. You, too, can have this lovely look with a little bit of chemo!
- My assignment from God at work is no longer to just work. It is to pray for my coworkers, which I do. Especially the ones who get on my nerves. Because blessed and fulfilled people don’t act like that.
- I’ve discovered the true desires of my heart. It is to have my sons know and have a relationship with the Lord. I know they can make it through life if they’re anchored in God.
- Finally, pay it forward. My line sisters—the women I pledged Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority with nearly 30 years ago—they made me this jar of inspirations. They got together over texts and email and phone and contributed over 100 inspirational quotes, scriptures and “you go girl” affirmations. Each one is its own slip of paper for me to pull from every day. That touched me deeply. So much so that I’ve been paying it forward. I made 2 jars for the hospital’s chemo patients in the chemo center and a few for friends who are battling cancer.
How am I, the one who didn’t want anyone to know about my diagnosis, able to stand before you to tell my story? It’s only by the Grace of God that decades ago, I was given the line name, “Amazing Grace” by my sorority sisters. And, as Verse 11B says, “God has planted eternity in the human heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope of God’s work from the beginning to end.” Well, all along, God was preparing me for such a time as this. Fitting the pieces together.